Long Distance Relationship: How to Make it Work.

If you are in a long distance relationship, the foremost thing to do is for both of you to have trust in each other. In every relationship there has to be trust, but for some reason, in long-distance relationships, it seems like there has to be just a little something more. Since you two are so far apart, you have to trust that the other one only wants to be with you and no one else. What I would always do, when I didn't know if I should do something that might be bad for our relationship, is I would put myself on the other end of the situation. I would pretend that it was my boyfriend doing it and then I would think of how I would feel if he did it. If you would get upset about it, than 10 times out of 10 so would he. There has to be trust in every important relationship because it won't last if there are doubts on either end. Always trust that your boyfriend is being honest with you and always be honest with him. The next thing a long-distance relationship needs is communication.

Good communication is a MUST! You and your boyfriend have to have open lines of communication. If something is bothering one of you, tell the other how you feel. If you are not open, the other will never know what you are thinking or if there is a problem. Unless you can read minds. Just kidding! There shouldn't be secrets kept from one another and if there are open communication lines, it will avoid any types of problems. Another aspect of communication that is important is expressing your feelings. If you are missing your boyfriend a lot one day, tell him. It will make him feel good to know that you are thinking of him and need him. By expressing your feelings, it will keep the relationship open and honest. And also add a little excitement for the next time you get to see each other!

You may think that it will be hard to communicate so far away, but in all actuality, it might be easier. One of the most popular ways loved ones keep in touch is through the computer. It is sometimes easier to write your feelings rather than saying them. This is a very effective, not to mention cheap, way to keep in touch with the one you love. There is also writing letters and talking on the phone, but I strongly suggest the e-mail option. Finally, the last thing that you need to keep a relationship going is good old-fashioned patience. You won't be able to see each other often, but stick with it. If you truly love each other, you will be able to get through the times when you can't see each other. It is hard, believe me I know! But if you hold on, it could turn into something very special. I wish you the best of luck to you and your boyfriend. If you have trust, communication and patience, I'm sure you'll be able to make it work.

Feelings and Love

Feelings are somewhat similar with most people who fall in love, there are different types of traits that most people tend to fall in love with. Trusting, caring, humor and friendship may be the best examples of features associated with healthy adult love relationships. To be cared for is one of the most rewarding feelings in one's life. In my life I know that I have many people that care about me but to be cared about by my boyfriend is completely different. This feeling is a sense of completeness. Throughout an individuals life they will have the opportunity to experience many different relationships involving these types of feelings for love. Many of these relationships will not be true romantic love. However, hopefully they will learn form these relationships so they do not repeat their mistakes from the past or let others do the same to them.

I am now in a relationship where I can say that I am truly in love. I know this because of the feelings I get when I am with this special person and I am definitely attached to him.
All of these feelings can be very complicated at times but when you are in the right relationship this emotional roller coaster is very well worth it to feel these powerful feelings of love. The relationship process is a complex amount of effort as well as feelings. Most every person will feel these feelings that I have described in some point in their life. When you do begin to feel these feelings of falling in love I wish you happiness and luck.

Aspects of Love

There are three main aspects of love. According to the triangular theory of love, these three components include intimacy, passion, and decision/commitment. Intimacy is the feeling of being connected and close to another person. It is getting to know the person beyond the friendship level and understanding them on a romantic level. An example of this might be going to dinner or the movies with a prospective mate, rather than the casual encounters that someone might have with them in everyday interaction. Intimacy does not only pertain to specific acts, but also in verbal and non-verbal expressions of love. Although verbal expressions of intimate feelings through self-disclosure are important to relationship quality, the nonverbal expression appears to be more important.

In general people rely more on nonverbal cues to interpret messages. Some examples of these nonverbal cues include touch, gaze, gestures, and time spent together. The next aspect of love is passion. Passion is the feelings or physical attraction and sexual consummation that people have for one another. This is more than idolization of a superstar such as Tom Cruise or Demi Moore. It is an attraction that one might have for a peer or a person with whom they are aquainted. Passion acts as the fire that helps the relationship function.

The last aspect of love is decision/commitment. Decision/commitment refers to the belief that one is in love and committed to a certain romantic relationship. This bond may be as informal as a phrase that states they want to date exclusively, or it might be as formal as a ring of gold that bonds them forever. This commitment is exclusive between partners, with the need to feel an equal level of commitment, which they need to decide together.

These three aspects involve no certain amount of time. It depends on the person or persons and the level of the relationship. Time will only give the couple some room to grow and expand the feelings felt for one another.

Falling In Love and Physiology

These physiological reactions include: erections for the male, wetness for the female, a lump in the throat, sweaty palms, weak knees, cold feet, a pounding heart dizziness, and butterflies in the stomach. These physiological reactions are completely normal when falling in love. The second type of feeling that one endures when falling in love is attachment. Attachment is a bond or a special tie between people that are attracted to one another. Attachment helps keep people together and has more to do with feelings of security than of excitement. Romantic love requires attraction plus attachment. Someone can be very strongly attracted to another person but never become attached. Without some feeling of attachment, attraction is nonspecific. Once you have begun to fall in love with someone, this process becomes more and more important and you begin to feel more attached to this person.

When in this state of attachment, each person would feel as if they are one person combined together. A special bond is shared and a sense of comfort and togetherness is felt in most any situation. This attachment is very normal in close relationships and healthy to a certain extent. Many times one person becomes more dependent on the other and this can be very unhealthy because everyone needs their own sense of identity. Without your own sense of identity, you might feel smothered or unable to function without your mate. Either way it is a lose-lose situation. For a healthy relationship, one needs to be able to function without total dependence on their mate.

Falling In Love

What is Love? Is it attraction? Is it intimacy? Is it attachment? Love, in fact, is all of these things combined together. "Love is spiritual, not physical. It is a union of souls and hearts and minds, not something you can't put under your microscope and understand!" Love is an emotion combined with a series of feelings. These feelings can be immensely powerful and wonderful. Romantic love is defined to be an intense emotional state that one person experiences in relation to another. These types of feelings appear to be among the most intense that most of us are capable of, and at least in some cases, grow rather than diminish with time. Falling in love can be one of the most unexplainable feelings a person can endure. There are two sets of feelings that are the basis of modern romantic relationships.

The first is attraction. Attraction is the excitement you feel when falling in love. To better explain this feeling, attraction is what you feel when you have met someone new who really excites you and you begin to feel aroused when thinking about this person. Although this sounds very sexual, this feeling is just the first of what will most likely become a sexual passion. When in this first state of attraction, your body feels different - more bouncy, more energetic, and in need of less food and sleep. When in this state of attraction, one feels very happy and different every time that they are with this person. Frequently the presence (or sometimes merely thought) of the loved one can evoke specific physiological reactions.

Authored By Mellisa Bernstein